No Prenup – More Problems
Are you as shocked as I was to learn that all of the reports out there seem to say that Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez NEVER SIGNED A PRE-MARITAL AGREEMENT? Yep, that’s right! The couple was married in July 2022 and were separated by April 2024. Even though the couple was not married for very long, because of their respective celebrity statuses in Hollywood and beyond, JLo and Ben accumulated substantial wealth during their short “less than 2 years” marriage. And that accumulated wealth must be addressed and divided. Reportedly, JLo and Ben started the mediation process in late August/early September 2024, and are in the midst of figuring these things out.
I suppose love is blind (or can be). But how could they be so blind as to not sign a Prenup? That blindness in not having a Prenuptial Agreement is costing them a lot of time and money now!
Sit with that for a while. Even if you do not have the wealth of JLo and Ben, if you are uncoupling from your spouse after a marriage that lasted for less than 2 years, would you really rather spend your money on attorneys and/or a mediator? Or would you rather leave that wealth for your children, family, yourself, …or literally anything else – you name it?
Your response: ____________
*I bet it was a “NO” to any attorney and mediator fees.
And, THAT is the reason a Prenup (aka Premarital Agreement) can be a good fit for anyone considering marriage.
Spending the time upfront, before marriage, and sharing the cost of drafting a Prenup, will not only save you frustration later if you do find yourself in the position of uncoupling from a marriage, but it will also save you a bunch of time and money. Consider this:
- Prenups allow you to approach difficult financial conversations with love and understanding
- Prenups allow you both to be transparent with each other about finances, your dreams, and aspirations
- Prenups allow you to discuss what assets you bring into the marriage and how you would divide them if you uncouple later
- Prenups allow you to discuss the issue of having children, and whether one of you would remove yourself from the workforce upon having a child
- Prenups allow you to discuss how you envision handling the finances during the marriage (e.g. joint accounts, separate accounts, household account, vacation account, etc.)
- Prenups allow you to discuss future homeownership and what that would look like
- Prenups allow you to discuss how you will handle vacations and pay for them
- Prenups allow you to consider estate planning needs that will, hopefully, lead you to crafting those documents
- Prenups allow you discuss opening a business or how to handle a family business that has been in existence
- Prenups allow you to discuss, candidly, debt and how to handle it
While there are some things that you cannot codify in a Prenup such as a child custody arrangement or specific child support amount, almost any ‘non-child’ situation you can think of can be addressed in a Prenup. Because these agreements not only address current assets, finances, debts, and the like, they absolutely help you with future planning.
“Yeah, but if I ask my fiancée (fiancé) for a Prenup, I am really saying to him/her that I have no faith our marriage will last.”
While it is true that many individuals think about getting a Prenup because they have seen ugly divorces of parents, friends, or other family members, the idea of these types of agreements is to make life much easier should you find it necessary to uncouple later. And, once you have these things laid out for you, you can spend your time enjoying each other without the “threat” of “what could happen” if we had to divorce. Simply put: the Prenup can hopefully provide you more security in your “happily ever after” as a couple.
Bottom line is, you really do not want to be like JLo and Ben. Anyone getting married, of any age, of any net worth, would benefit from considering a Prenup well in advance of the wedding day.
If you are recently engaged, congratulations on your upcoming wedding!! But seriously, consider a Prenup as part of the planning process leading up to that big day!
If you or someone you know wants to learn more about Premarital Agreements (aka the “Prenup”), our Modern Legal Team is here to help.
Please note: these educational materials are based on North Carolina law where my legal practice is based. While the insights may have wide applicability, readers should consult with an attorney regarding the specific laws in their state or country.
Written by: Deborah L. Dilman
