Millenial, not Marriage…silly.
The first time I was asked whether I was a “Millennial” as an adult, the first thought that crossed my mind was the fear associated with the onset of the year “2000.” In particular, the technology fear caught my interest. Up to the 1990’s, computer programmers had historically programmed the year for two-digits. Therefore, “1999” was reflected in computer programs as “99.” But what would happen when the computers went to “00.” Would a computer apocalypse occur? What about all of the “end of the world” predictions? Would technology collapse and humanity revert 100 years?
Yes, I sat in front of a computer on the eve of the New Year entering 2000. As a computer game connoisseur, my fear was very real. I sat there turning on and off my computer to make sure it still worked. Luckily, the world did not collapse and my computer was still operable at 12:01 a.m.
I feel the same fear is shared by different generations in their interactions with millennials. I mean, how can someone relate to a millennial? I mean let’s be honest, we are different! Let’s discuss…
Loosely defined as individuals born between 1981 to 1996, Millennials comprise the largest degree-accomplished generation to date. Around 39% of Millennials have a bachelor’s degree or higher, compared to just 15% of the Silent Generation, roughly 25% of Baby Boomers, and 30% of Gen Xers when they were the same age.[1] Similar trends exist for master’s and doctorate degrees. Even without a college degree, most jobs require some sort of technical expertise in computers; for example, mechanics use computers to keep track of vehicle maintenance. And let’s not forget that most millennials have smartphones and an unofficial degree in “app” technology.
With a greater resource of knowledge, Millennials tend to focus on creating sustainable careers, communities, and families. Generally speaking, Millennials focus less on political and social drama to figure out how to positively impact the world around them. Think about it. Shaming for not recycling is a thing. The economic and health burdens of smoking cigarettes are no longer “cool.” And small, compact, and efficient things are all the rage: surround-sound stereo speakers you can hold in your hand, tablets and smartphones over laptops, and tiny houses! But I digress.
What about our relationships? Well to begin: the dating paradigm has shifted. Marrying while in high school, just after high school, or in college is a fading trend. Even Millennials who are married to their high school or college significant others wait until after college to engage in the nuptials. For the Millennials with no such luck in finding a person in school, they get to engage in the “modern dating era” wrought with swiping dating apps, texting with emoticons over long phone calls, and the influx of social media. All the while, Millennials, both female and male, are developing their careers with a hope of changing the world for the better instead of simply having a job to get a paycheck.
With a focus on higher education, a meaningful and sustainable career, and a healthy and efficient lifestyle, Millennials marry later in life with notable implications. Most importantly, Millennials are marrying with an already established empire. Note the following:
- With women attaining college degrees at higher rates, women are accessing higher wages.
- Single women own more homes than single men.[2]
- Retirement planning is a focus of single adults as well as married adults. Millennials in particular are contributing to retirement savings accounts soon after entering the work force instead of waiting until marriage. I had a friend that started a retirement account back in high school.
- Millennials are not embarrassed to continue to drive the vehicle they had in school to help reduce overhead costs.
- Millennials tend to be less material-focused and more experience-focused when spending money. Smaller homes with less stuff are traded in from more money to spend on international travel, fun outings with friends, and experiences that create lifelong stories.
- There is a trend of Millennials living with their significant others prior to marriage.
- A dual income Millennial household is the norm, not the exception.
- A Millennial household involves a greater balance of household chores as well as development of careers between both spouses.
Established individual empires lead to a need of greater financial transparency between individuals that are contemplating marriage. Millennials enjoy immediate gratification as it relates to communications, return on investment of time and work, and entertainment activates. However, Millennials are keenly aware of the number of failed marriages and relationships due to rushed actions. Patience and certainty in relationships – I mean, there’s an “app” for that, right? Unfortunately, the app developers are still working on this one.
As a family law attorney in the rise of the Millennial Marriage, the best piece of advice I can impart is to plan and take marriage seriously. Regardless of the emotions involved, a marriage is a financial contract. Your legal rights as it relates to your money, your investments, and your retirement literally change overnight on your wedding day.
When your health is good, are you extremely concerned about the intricacies of your health insurance policy? What about the day you have a cold? Or are diagnosed with cancer? And you definitely don’t want to think about a life insurance policy although we all are going to die. Although these are sad topics we tend to sway away from, a failed marriage is a very real possibility for everyone. I hate to reiterate over said clichés, but seriously, hope for the best but plan for the worst.
Regardless of your age and regardless of your financial and personal situation, if you are planning to get married, consult with a family law attorney before the nuptials to ensure an understanding of the legal applications of marriage.
If you would like to learn more about Legal Rights changing in relationships and marriage, our Modern Legal team is here to help.
Please note: these educational materials are based on North Carolina law where my legal practice is based. While the insights may have wide applicability, readers should consult with an attorney regarding the specific laws in their state or country.
Written by: Theresa E. Viera
[1] Kristen Bialik and Richard Fry, Millenial life: How young adulthood today compares with prior generations, Pew Research Center, February 14, 2019, https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2019/02/14/millennial-life-how-young-adulthood-today-compares-with-prior-generations-2/.
[2] Aly J. Yale, Single Women Own More Homes Than Single Men—But They Pay More, Too, Forbes.com, January 22, 2020, https://www.forbes.com/sites/alyyale/2020/01/22/single-women-own-more-homes-than-single-men–but-they-pay-more-too/?sh=2faa7d7d28ca.
